“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.”
— Isaiah 55:8–9

Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth.
— Colossians 3:2

I hate being disappointed. It really is the worst feeling. Unfortunately, it is a feeling I am all too familiar with.

There have been times when people I was counting on failed me. There have been times when I wanted to be there for someone else and couldn’t be. I have asked women out and been told no. I have gone in for a kiss and been pushed away. A couple of times, I didn’t get a second date. I have worked hard and not gotten a promotion, and even wrote the best essay ever and still got a bad grade.

Disappointment is a part of life. Sometimes it will be your fault, sometimes it will be completely out of your control. But every time, you will probably have that sick feeling in your stomach. What you do next is really important.

If you’re wise, you will lean in to God and remember it’s OK to feel grief and be sad. Remember that not everything is going to work out the way you want, and that God’s ways are not your ways. You may never understand why things happened the way they did, but he has proven himself faithful over and over again, and given enough time, you will see his faithfulness even in this.

Or you can convince yourself that the world owes you, the people in your life owe you, and that God himself owes you something. Your disappointment and sorrow will become the greatest injustice the world has ever known, and you will never be able to move forward.

That’s scary because what should be a temporary state of grief can take up permanent residence in your heart, robbing you of any joy and opportunity you could experience otherwise. Expectation and entitlement will feed your grief, and that will crush your soul.

The book of Colossians reminds us to set our minds on things above. When you look to God in those disappointing moments, it’s easier to trust that he will be and do what he said he would be and do. Start there, and then everything else falls into its place. Having a godly perspective won’t save you from disappointment, but it will help you remember that everything will be OK.