Do you remember the last time you cried? Not just a little cry, but that ugly, snot bubbles, can’t-catch-your-breath type of cry? It is the crying that comes from deep desperation of hurt, longing, helplessness, and heartache. What happens when we are in the middle of one of those sessions, and the phone rings, and we need to answer it? We try to gain our composure and act like we are not crying but, inevitably, the person asks, “Are you OK?” “Yes, I’m fine.” But you are not OK, and you know it.
Read Luke 7:36–50.
What this woman did was not politically correct. Nor was she following the teaching of the religious leaders of the day. She was desperate, and she knew it. She needed spiritual healing, and the only person who could offer this healing was Jesus. She went to the source of healing and cried out to her God. She sought forgiveness for her sins, and she found it. Her healing began, and her faith saved her.
I believe there is something in us that attempts to hide our deepest and darkest pains. We desire to cover up with the fig leaves of our strength, prestige, or any other way we feel we can do it. Spiritual healing does not come by our anything, but by the grace of God.
For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.
— Ephesians 2:8–9
God does not need you to get your life in order before you come before him. He does not require you to offer the steps by which you will grow. He does not need you to say you are OK when you are not.
It is time for you to be brutally honest. Bow yourself before God as someone who understands the depth of their hurt, pain, and sin and cry out to a God who is the healer. Be honest with God. Don’t try to make things better than they are. He knows your doubts, your fears, and even the ways you feel God has let you down. Say it to him. Trust Him as the source of healing. Cry out to God.